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House: Season 6 Episode 12: Moving the Chains



Just in time for Super Bowl week, House’s patient of the week is #77 on the field, #1 in your heart, a very large college football player who’s being scouted.  As the kid — Daryl–‘s mother talks up her son to a scout in the stands.  Daryl is like a raging bull, charging across the field, plowing into everyone and everything in sight.  The aggression doesn’t stop there. Daryl takes off his helmet starts beating himself in the forehead with it, drawing blood. Lots of blood.  So much blood, in fact, that he’s whisked off to Princeton-Plainsboro for House and his team of crackerjack diagnosticians to figure out what’s wrong. 

The team attempts the clock to discover what’s wrong with Daryl before his mystery malady kills him, and all before Saturday, when Daryl has a tryout in front of scouts in the hopes to kick off his pro football career.  At over 6’5″ and 300+ lbs., House’s first reaction is that it’s a bad case of ‘roid rage or pituitary damage.  When nothing shows on the scans, House wonders if Daryl “got his hands on the good stuff,” possibly HGH.  As usual, the staff exhausts every possibility until House has his 11th hour epiphany that Daryl has melanoma located on his foot.  Disguised by the fact that Daryl is black and melanoma rarely affects people of color, House sees the treatable spot on the football player’s foot. 

Speaking of feet, House also finds himself dealing with another patient, a young war veteran with a pregnant wife who has already seen three tours of unplanned duty and is being dispatched for a fourth in the Middle East.  Frightened at the prospect of his child possibly growing up without a father, the young soldier takes House’s advice and shoots himself in the foot.  He allows the infection from the wound to spread until not just his toe (apparently, soldiers can still serve with only nine toes) but entire foot must be amputated, exempting him from active duty.

The race to solve the medical cases of patients is complicated by the usual sort of storyline drama creeping in.  House and Wilson appear to have a little War of the Roses spat with one another in their apartment kicked off by House soaking his sore leg in Wilson’s oversized canoe of a tub in Wilson’s private bathroom.  A series of very expensive misunderstandings involving  putting a possum in the bathtub and loosening the handicapped rail on the side of the tub.

What initially seems like House and Wilson engaging one another in clever one-upsmanship results in the Odd Couple discovering that neither of them was behind the (very expensive) pranks when the sprinkler system waterlogs their condo and destroys their prized flatscreen.  Realizing that neither of them would sacrifice the ginormous television set, House and Wilson learn that Cuddy’s boyfriend, Lucas, was behind it all.  Being a detective, he uncovered that House and Wilson bought their dream loft and decided to assert his superiority to the Odd Couple as a sort of revenge on behalf of his lady love.  He retains House and Wilson’s silence by agreeing to keep mum that the two of them deliberately bought the place she wanted since she’s under the odd impression that they’re really her friends.  Ouch.

Lucas’s vengeance on House and Wilson is nothing compared to House’s dealings with his staff this week.  When Foreman’s brother, Marcus (Orlando Jones) is released from prison, he hires him as his new assistant.  Foreman is none too happy with House hiring his ex-con/ex-addict brother, insisting that House isn’t doing this to help out a man in need of a job, but rather to screw with Forman. 

Marcus fills in House on many details of his relationship with his brother, including the story that Foreman wet the bed one night over at Bobby Samson’s and the eulogy that Foreman gave at their mother’s funeral. When Marcus and Foreman were caught by the cops as teens, their mother picked them up from the station with just the words that she would pray for them.  While Marcus embarked on a continued life of crime, Foreman’s mission in life became to never disappoint his mother again.  When House was taken aback that Foreman never told him that his mother had recently died, Marcus pleaded with House not to mention their mother to his brother. 

Of course, that means that House brought up Foreman’s dead mother to Foreman.  Ultimately, the end result was that the once estranged brothers Foreman became close once again thanks to a kinder, gentler House who still wants everyone to believe he’s old, completely douche-y House.  As Wilson observed, House’s lack of relationship with his own family led him to covertly bring Foreman (AKA – “House Lite”) closer to his remaining family.

Just in time for Super Bowl week, House’s patient of the week is #77 on the field, #1 in your heart, a very large college football player who’s being scouted.  As the kid — Daryl–‘s mother talks up her son to a scout in the stands.  Daryl is like a raging bull, charging across the field, plowing into everyone and everything in sight.  The aggression doesn’t stop there. Daryl takes off his helmet starts beating himself in the forehead with it, drawing blood. Lots of blood.  So much blood, in fact, that he’s whisked off to Princeton-Plainsboro for House and his team of crackerjack diagnosticians to figure out what’s wrong. 

The team attempts the clock to discover what’s wrong with Daryl before his mystery malady kills him, and all before Saturday, when Daryl has a tryout in front of scouts in the hopes to kick off his pro football career.  At over 6’5″ and 300+ lbs., House’s first reaction is that it’s a bad case of ‘roid rage or pituitary damage.  When nothing shows on the scans, House wonders if Daryl “got his hands on the good stuff,” possibly HGH.  As usual, the staff exhausts every possibility until House has his 11th hour epiphany that Daryl has melanoma located on his foot.  Disguised by the fact that Daryl is black and melanoma rarely affects people of color, House sees the treatable spot on the football player’s foot. 

Speaking of feet, House also finds himself dealing with another patient, a young war veteran with a pregnant wife who has already seen three tours of unplanned duty and is being dispatched for a fourth in the Middle East.  Frightened at the prospect of his child possibly growing up without a father, the young soldier takes House’s advice and shoots himself in the foot.  He allows the infection from the wound to spread until not just his toe (apparently, soldiers can still serve with only nine toes) but entire foot must be amputated, exempting him from active duty.

The race to solve the medical cases of patients is complicated by the usual sort of storyline drama creeping in.  House and Wilson appear to have a little War of the Roses spat with one another in their apartment kicked off by House soaking his sore leg in Wilson’s oversized canoe of a tub in Wilson’s private bathroom.  A series of very expensive misunderstandings involving  putting a possum in the bathtub and loosening the handicapped rail on the side of the tub.

What initially seems like House and Wilson engaging one another in clever one-upsmanship results in the Odd Couple discovering that neither of them was behind the (very expensive) pranks when the sprinkler system waterlogs their condo and destroys their prized flatscreen.  Realizing that neither of them would sacrifice the ginormous television set, House and Wilson learn that Cuddy’s boyfriend, Lucas, was behind it all.  Being a detective, he uncovered that House and Wilson bought their dream loft and decided to assert his superiority to the Odd Couple as a sort of revenge on behalf of his lady love.  He retains House and Wilson’s silence by agreeing to keep mum that the two of them deliberately bought the place she wanted since she’s under the odd impression that they’re really her friends.  Ouch.

Lucas’s vengeance on House and Wilson is nothing compared to House’s dealings with his staff this week.  When Foreman’s brother, Marcus (Orlando Jones) is released from prison, he hires him as his new assistant.  Foreman is none too happy with House hiring his ex-con/ex-addict brother, insisting that House isn’t doing this to help out a man in need of a job, but rather to screw with Forman. 

Marcus fills in House on many details of his relationship with his brother, including the story that Foreman wet the bed one night over at Bobby Samson’s and the eulogy that Foreman gave at their mother’s funeral. When Marcus and Foreman were caught by the cops as teens, their mother picked them up from the station with just the words that she would pray for them.  While Marcus embarked on a continued life of crime, Foreman’s mission in life became to never disappoint his mother again.  When House was taken aback that Foreman never told him that his mother had recently died, Marcus pleaded with House not to mention their mother to his brother. 

Of course, that means that House brought up Foreman’s dead mother to Foreman.  Ultimately, the end result was that the once estranged brothers Foreman became close once again thanks to a kinder, gentler House who still wants everyone to believe he’s old, completely douche-y House.  As Wilson observed, House’s lack of relationship with his own family led him to covertly bring Foreman (AKA – “House Lite”) closer to his remaining family.

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